To all the females and to those males who support them in their endeavour.
On the trip to a conference in Istanbul, a lady traveling with her friend told me in a cab “I have never experienced that being a female is hard”. This is true, I also have never experienced it till I wanted to do something big. Nobody tells you in school when you are painting a sun and mountains that you can’t do them. When you start telling how you want to change the industry and you are in a deep tech with a predominantly male culture (IT) having no IT skills to note, your life starts to look different.
It’s when a VC fund says “you can’t do it, I don’t believe it”. And it’s not because you are a female, it’s because of a bunch of other reasons: co-founder, technical expertise, market potential, understanding what is it that you want to build, 1st time in business, and people who will make it happen. Can be hard, right? But none of this is true, because if you want to get something done, you can get it done. And we made it.
Staying resilient when someone says your idea is silly. Whether it is language, expression or general understanding, if you believe it is a good idea, go for it regardless what others say. At the end, you don’t have others with you, you only have yourself, and if it can make it better for you, just do it. You don’t want to regret for not doing something because someone else didn’t want it. It is your life and there are no wrong choices, there are just choices. Judgement what is good or not is biased and individual-dependent.
On this path, some may be hard and bring you to tears. Just let it go, if you can’t keep them, throw them, and understand that it’s a nature of males being hard. Have you watched the male football? How different it is from female’s one? They are aggressive and pushy, pushing just to show the power. Males are hard by themselves, no need to cry when they apply same methods as for their male partners. Females on the other hand don’t fight so much and with such aggression, are cooperative and way more careful. Same like for mice or other animals. When you keep this in mind your feelings start to be different. And it feels better each time.
Pushing forward regardless of what others think and how many times others said “no”, builds resilience and creates progress. Companies are made with those who said “yes”, both on the recruiting and on the customer side. It’s a tribe, a circle of like minded people. Seth Godin says “We need you to lead us” in a subtitle to Tribes. If one needs only a relative small tribe to be successful, everyone can start arranging it. It takes leadership to get it started, the rest will follow.
Showing boundaries for those who want to take advantage of you, is another thing to implement into your life. The more you play, the higher the probability you will find your percent of bad success. But having the tools to eliminate it helps increase the value of playing more, and reduces such zero point something percentages of potentially bad cases.
Stick to your agenda and execute a plan. Leadership is about doing something, sitting on the sofa imaging how big you can be is not of help. Doing the things will produce the new questions you want to ask, and so over time you get better. There is no clear knowledge in what will happen if you X, once you do X you can have this knowledge, till that time you only have guesses and assumptions, which may not be true.
On this path of doing things, it is important to stay calm when * things happen. Having a hold of the situation is a trait that will help you to be more rationale over time, and set higher challenges for yourself, in short it means growth for you as a person. Therefore, embrace it and move on making conclusions and reflecting on the things.
#ChooseToChallenge acknowledged, as well as recent Bumble’s IPO.